Starza's Fandom Blog

Here's a review for a series I don't really cover here, even though I've been a part of it since Tales of Destiny was out on the PSX. Tales games have always been hit and miss, though more hits than misses. Abyss has been my all time favorite, but I don't really ship yaoi in it (In fact, most tales of games, I tend to ship the Het pairings). There are only two tales games where I accept male/male pairings (A few of them I accept female/female, but I'm only going to focus on Yaoi), Zestria, and now Vesperia. And the irony of this is both Tales games don't focus really on romantic pairings. Zestria has like zero focus, and Vesperia can be seen as strictly platonic between Yuri, our protag, and Estelle, our female protag.

Vesperia is a weird Tales of game, mostly because it was released ONLY on the Xbox (Who releases JRPGs on that console, I mean, really), and while there was a upgraded version (That added in two playable characters to the original 7 cast, and was on the PS3, which blows my mind, Namco), it wasn't released until Janurary of 2019, nearly 10 years later. So basically, I'm way late into the fandom.

I may give a review on Tales of Vesperia in the future, but let's focus on this fic, and boy, this is really out of my norm because:

1. Modern AUs of high fantasy tend to be 90% terrible
2. This story would have greatly benefited from a beta reader
3. It's a much older work, almost 6 years old, if not older since it was on FF.net first
4. This is a story that does not match my taste at all

So basically, this is a story that should not cater to my tastes at all. Yet, for some really weird reason, I enjoyed reading it.

Also, take note of the warnings, this author does not supply any warnings at all.

Series: Tales of Vesperia
Title: Lonely Lovers Club
Author: OniZenmaru
Genre: Romance/Angst
Rating: E for Sexual content and warnings I'll give
Warning: Child abuse, underage sex, unsafe sex practices, homophobia, suicide mentions
Couple (if applicable): Yuri/Flynn, minor off pairings

Plot: 9/10 - The only reason this story scores this high is because the plot is actually really good, if you ignore that it runs more like original work rather than Tales of Vesperia work. I kind of don't want to spoil the plot itself, but it's basically a sort of coming of age type plot. Flynn has been de-aged (I think he's around Yuri's age in canon, while here, he's about 7 years younger in this story, 17, and Yuri is younger in canon, which is 22, and the story, his age is around 25), and he realizes that he's gay and comes to term with it. So what does he do? Goes to a Gay bar! That's where he meets Yuri and things just progress from there. It first just starts out as Yuri helping Flynn's sexual awakening, but then it takes a dark turn really fast when a certain incident happens at his home, which causes Flynn to run away and strangely, end up at Yuri's apartment. And Yuri just... takes the guy in. And the story progresses on a more slow burn note with a lot of angst and random by fluff.

So yeah, PLEASE take note of the warnings I put up. Especially the child abuse one. Yeah, you'll see in the story that Flynn's mother is not right in the head after an accident that took Flynn's father's life. And of course, she takes it out on Flynn, in some of the most disturbing ways possible (As in not just physical abuse, but also mental, and physical abuse in both violent and starting to boarder sexual as well).

So we have a coming of age story mixed in with a serious child abuse story. Also, Yuri's past here also takes a darker tone, but in a slightly different direction.

Honestly, this should be original work, because outside the plot, you can barely tell this is a Vesperia story.

Writing: 5/10 - This is where the writing suffers a lot. The thing is, everything is spelled correctly. I can't remember a word that was totally mangled because of it's spelling.

The problem is the grammar. There are a ton of sentences that lack comma structure and overall use the wrong word that a spell checker would not pick up.

Examples: "Flynn Scifo had always known that something was off about him, that he functioned in a different way compared to his peers, but had never once tired to recognize it." tired - tried

"So he mauled it over, but made sure to be discreet as he eyed the men around him." mauled - mulled

"Other than sex he'd just make out with some guy on the dace floor or at the bar, thus how his make-out skills had improved." dace- dance (There's a ton of dace/dance errors in this story), missing comma after 'other than sex'

And trust me, there are way more errors than that, but if I listed them all, I'd have to post this review in like two parts. This is where a beta reader or even a grammar checker would greatly benefit. Some of the sentences lack structure, but the overall problem is that words are used incorrectly.

Characterization 4/10 - Honestly, like I said, you can barely tell this is a Tales of Vesperia fic, the characters are written with some of their core personalities. Mostly Yuri and Raven (Yuri's highly smug and sarcastic with a darker side who likes to cook, and Raven is your outgoing fun guy), to some degree, along with Estelle (Naive at first glance, but understanding and does catch on things) and Rita (Tsundre, all I have to say), and the fact that Flynn is a clean person is, believe it or not, canon. But if you changed the names, you wouldn't know this was a Tales of Vesperia fic.

Again, this is the problem with writing AUs in general, most fics take the character's bare bones personalities, puts them in a universe, and expects readers to be happy. 90% of the time, modern AUs of fandoms that are high fantasy just don't work, period. In fact, the majority of AUs like this don't work.

The only thing that really saves this story is the plot and the way the story is, in general. I don't like over the top angsty pieces, but it actually does work well here.

Negatives: Can barely tell it's related to Tales of Vesperia, lots of misplaced words and missing commas, angst can sometimes touch the 'melodrama' line

Summary: A chance meeting with a certain long haired man changes Flynn's life forever. Also, a coming of age/acceptance story.

Overall: 6/10 - Although I rated this really low, and most fics I rate this low, I don't really recommend or even like, I strangely enjoyed this story. This is the first time I'm going to say, 'guilty pleasure', because while it has structure problems and characterization is really not there, the story does have heart, and I didn't regret reading it. If you can stomach the problems I listed above and aren't extremely picky about characterization, I'd say give it a read, just for the overall plot and story. If you're looking for something that relates mostly to canon, you should look elsewhere.

Up next, not sure. Maybe either a Tales of Vesperia review or I'm going to post up something about a lot of Persona 5 unfinished works and why to still read them or just abandon them as unfinished forever, as a lot of the works I followed haven't been updated in some time. :/

Oh, I have been waiting for some just wretched fanfic writing from this fandom and I FINALLY found one. The thing is? I don't know if this story is supposed to be taken seriously or if it's purposely written to BE a bad fanfic. I mean, it has ALL the classic signs of a bad fanfic. But for the first time, I can't tell 'if srs'. The thing is, if you go into this fic with the mind set of a bad fanfic, you actually may get entertainment out of it. But if you go into it expecting something remotely decent... Yeah...

Also, look at those warnings...

Series: Persona 5
Title: It Needs Work
Author: Freckledbun
Genre: Angst/fucked up ness up the ass
Rating: E
Warning: OOCness, random typos, stalker becoming the stalkee, rape, Incest, NCS, Psychological issues (Both these boys need to be put in a mental hospital, STAT!), self harm... Seriously, READ the author warnings, cause I don't want to type them all out, but if you have any triggers, beware
Couple (if applicable): Akechi/Akira mostly

Plot: 3/10 - I mean, what can I say about it? Basically, Akira starts out as a creeper with massive issues. I mean, he basically creates his own image of Akechi before he even mets him (later referred to as Fakechi in the story), and gets his 'inspiration' from him for his fanfics that he writes of him as Joker and Akechi. Like that's really laughable and ironic to this fic. Oh, also, while Morgana is real, he pretends that the cat can talk. And is also a slut, sleeping with just about everyone. It's like a really warped version of Persona 5. SIGH...

Meanwhile, we have the real Akechi, who apparently starts stalking Akira. Somehow they end up in a relationship. Later on, Akira walks into Akechi's apartment and finds him killing someone and... it just descends from there. Like, there's a really good reason the author put in those warnings.

So yeah, part of the story has Akira locked in a box for some time and it's just... not good. Also, remember that scene I was flipping out about in TnC, aka Screwdriver scene? Well, this story has something very simular, only it's a gun this time. I burst out laughing and then wanted to cry cause I was having TnC flashbacks while reading that part.

So you think with what I said above that this fic couldn't get any worse? Oh yeah it does. It goes into whacko land in it's second arc where Shido shows up, kidnaps Akira and basically makes him into a sex slave. Again, be mindful of the warnings, cause it's really bad in that chapter and the following one as well.

After the horror show of that, we get to the first sensible thing that anyone ever says in this trash, Akechi tells Akira to go get help and stay away from him. But you think anyone in this fic follows common sense? NAH!

There's one more batshit insane scene where basically Akechi buries Akira alive to 'surpress his murder overtones'. Like holy shit, I just... am lost for words, the fact that someone goes THAT far, but that someone even LETS them do that to themselves... BOTH these two need to be locked away in a mental hospital, ASAP.

I'll have to say, the ending is sort of clever, but in the context of this story? It's wasted and it doesn't make a lot of sense (I was kind of expecting 'Joker' to kill off Akechi when I saw the twist, but it's just more buttsex. SIGH!). So it's all a bad ending that does link to canon, even though at the very beginning, it was basically a 'no powers' type of story? With zero indication of it??? Yeah... Totally wasted.

Writing 3/10 - You know what's fucked up? This author CAN write some good shit. House of Wolves, while mostly drabbles, had a REALLY good concept and was written fairly well. This fic? Seems like the author typed it up and threw it up on Ao3 without rereading it or letting someone read it for them. There's a lot of typos that a simple spell checker would pick up along with grammar errors. I noticed a lot of periods in between words, and a spell checker WILL pick that crap up. Along with the same typos and misuse of same sounding words (two and too for example) and I saw AKira (Yeah, the first TWO letters capitalized) and several other words like that, where the first two letters are in caps when they shouldn't be.

Also, the writing itself can be really bland at times. The descriptions are bones bare as well. Let's not even get into the characterizations, or I should say 'what characterizations?' here. ~_~''

Characterization 1/10 - Yeah, this barely qualifies as a Persona 5 fanfic. Most of the characters, thank god, don't show up, but when they do, they're pretty much OOC. I mean, what bad fanfic would be complete without character bastardization?

I mean, again I ask, WHY write fanfiction featuring characters from something when a reader can barely tell it's from that fandom? JUST write freaking original fiction at that point, you could get paid for it, at the very least. 'Oh, it's just fanfiction'. No, that excuse doesn't fly, it NEVER flew with me, ever. When I read fanfiction, I want to read about the characters that I liked from the canon, why in the holy mother of fuck would I want to read a fanfic with no semblence to what it's originally from??? It's like taking Dragon Quest and slapping Final Fantasy over the name, but changing the proper nouns to more Final Fantasy sounding names.

Negatives: Low quality writing, insane plot, OOCness, lots and lots of squick moments

Summary: Akira develops a unhealthy obsession crush on the Dectective Prince that he's seen all of one time. It's all downhill from there...

Overall: 2.3/10 - Pretty much bottom tier fanfiction material. HOWEVER, if you go into this story expecting bad fanfiction, you'll probably get a kick out of it. And if the author kept that tone throughout the story, then I'd actually recommend reading it because it's one of those 'so bad, it's good!' things. But that tone doesn't stay, and just goes downhill very fast. In the end, I'd say stay clear of this one, moreso with all those warnings on there.

Well, a fic I was following for a while finally finished. It's pretty unusual for me, since the last two fics were pretty much angst ridden (Moreso the last). I vastly prefer angst in my Akira/Akechi stories, mostly because Akechi himself carries a lot of emotional baggage, and while this fic does have angst, it tilts more to the side of fluff, mostly in the second half.

This story also made me appreciate Haru a heck of a lot more. Not a lot of stories feature her, and in a more positive light, especially when it comes to this pairing, cause of spoilerly reasons. This fic is pretty much the opposite of how Haru reacts in Crooked Hands. However, I can accept it in this story for one big reason: Time skip.

Series: Persona 5
Title: Yesterday's Protagonist
Author: Valiantarmor
Genre: Flangst, though leans more to fluff than angst
Rating: E
Warning: Fix-it future fic (Is this even a warning?), spoilers all the way to the end game, lots of kinky sex in the second half (Be mindful of the author warnings), one of the longer slow burn fics (Not really a warning... >.>)
Couple (if applicable): Akira/Akechi

Plot: N/A - I'm actually not going to rate the plot, for once, because there is no real plot. It's not really a character study either (Though the story is very heavy focused on Akechi, about maybe 70% of it), and there's no real conflict in the story (Unless you count Akechi's unease at everyone being so accepting as conflict?). It's pretty much a slow burn future fix it fic, there's really no other way to describe it. Basically, five years have passed since the end of the game and everyone has pretty much moved on to what happened. Cept Akira, who regrets not being able to save Akechi from all those years ago. Akira visits a shrine to basically 'pay respects to Akechi', sort of like a repentance, and moves on with his life as best he can. During one of his nightly visits to the shrine, Akechi appears, and basically, things go from there.

Honestly, you have to be in the right mood to read this, more so in the second half, where it's pretty much just kinky smut between Akira and Akechi with some side stuff happening from time to time (Which I'll cover in characterization), and cute domestic fluff.

All I say is this: This is probably the ONLY fic I'll say where fluff works for this pairing. There's other reasons too but I'll cover it in the characters.

Also, this is a REALLY long story, and really, it's kind of a two part story. The first five or so chapters building up to the relationship, and the second half being more domestic with some angst on the side from Akira that ends happily ever after. If you love slow burn romances, this is pretty much picture perfect of it, you got your relationship building part and you have your domestic part, or more of an intimacy builder. A lot of slow burn fics stop when the relationship forms, maybe one or two scenes of intimacy, and ends. This story continues on, and it actually adds to the relationship as a whole. Which I think is really needed for a pairing like this set in the future.

Writing: 10/10 - You can easily tell the author put a shitton of effort into this. It's also one of the longer slow burn fics I've ever read, and it hits every button I want in a slow burn fic. You got the relationship building, you have your intimate times, not just in the bedroom either (Though it has some wonderful build up of kinks, which I rarely, if ever, see in fiction), you have the others trying to accept Akechi into their circle along with the relationship itself, you have angst coming from both parties (Too many fics focus on one character, usually Akechi in this pairing's case), and then you have some soft quiet moments.

I think outside of the main pairing, my absolute favorite scene is Akechi's interactions with the others, specifically, Morgana and Haru (I do enjoy Futaba's as well, but it's very minor). If you like Haru, she really shines here, and shows she's probably the most awesome friend ever. And seeing Akechi slowly blending in with the others (The scene where Akira comes home finding Akechi asleep with Morgana on his lap is one of my favorite 'quiet moments') and slowly becoming part of their lives, it's not often you see. Most fics sort of push the other Phantom Thieves to the side with this pairing, or it gets really ugly and only Akira seems to want to help Akechi while the others are on the fence or just don't want to help period. I think the time skip helps a lot here, because they're not teens anymore, they're young adults, and they had time to reflect on things. I'll go more into this later too.

Characterization: 9.5/10 - This is where most of this review is going to go, because really, this story isn't focused on a plot or any kind of conflict. It's focused on the characters themselves, mostly Akira and Akechi, with the other characters around them. It's basically the two characters falling in love with one another (More so Akechi than Akira), some fluffy moments, some angst moments, lots of kinky moments, etc. Basically, if you want to see a slow burn future fic featuring Akira and Akechi, from the falling IN love to domestic life of the two to the 'adult side' of it, this is probably the only fic I'd recommend. Also, Kudos to the author for giving line breaks so if you don't want to read the smut, you don't have to. I, however, REALLY recommend reading the majority of it (Mostly because their relationship is a two way street, both outside and inside the bedroom, and they don't suffer from your typical seme/uke trope that most yaoi pairings fall into), it really adds to the relationship.

Lemme cover some of the featured characters. Most of the Phantom Thieves make casual appearances. Really, the story only shows Akira, Akechi, Morgana, Haru, and Sae Niijima, for the most part. Futaba appears along with Sojiro too.

( Spoilers for the fic )

I docked a half point for really one thing that is a small minor flaw for me: The maid parts in chapter 6 come out of nowhere. Unlike most of the fetishes in the story, this one isn't built up and comes out of nowhere. Where as others, like the choking, hair pulling, and praise kink, are built up from nearly the beginning. This one doesn't, which puzzles me (I could've missed a cue for it earlier, but I don't remember seeing it). But it doesn't tarnish the story, and honestly, it doesn't even really affect the story (Plus the fact that it's well written helps too), which is why I only docked half.

Negatives: No real plot to speak of, might be too fluffy for some Akira/Akechi fans?

Summary: After five years since the end of the game, Akechi walks back into Akira's life. This time, Akira is determined to keep him there.

Overall: 9.75/10 - If you're looking for a slow build future fic for this pairing along with some well written smut, this fic will pretty much cover it. Again, I'm not a huge fan of Akechi/Akira fluff fics. This fic makes it work. If you're a fan of this pairing, this is pretty much a 'must read' fic. If you're not a fan, this might get you there, moreso if you enjoy built up romances and don't mind post canon fics. While a lot of the story is pretty fluffy, it has it's does of angst and does justice (HAH!) to not only the pairing, but to the other characters as well.

Edit: I had to edit this review due to me realizing that a scene I liked? Didn't happen in this fic. That's what I get for typing out reviews and comments so late at night. ~_~;; Or at least it would help if I re-read the entire fic before I type out a review/comment. Again, apologizes. ~_~;;

I swear to god, I'm going to review another pairing one of these days. This fandom is spoiling me rotten with high quality fanfics. I think this is a first time where I reviewed 3 separate fics in such a positive light (I rarely give fics above a 7, the last few fics I've given above 9s!). Like really spoiling me rotten.

HOWEVER! That may end up coming to a close! There's a fic for my preferred pairing that just got done, but it's going to definitely be one of those 'unpopular' opinions from me again, so... stay tuned!

Well, a fic that I was keeping my eye on finally finished, so I might as well start with this one.

First off, maybe because this fandom is still really new, but the quality of fics that I found for Persona 5 is pretty high. Most of the time, when I see a fic that catches my eye, it actually turns out to be a good story. There is only one tiny problem.

The majority of the good quality fic tends to be Akira/Akechi. Yeah, this is a pairing I feel the most neutral on, obviously because of game spoilers. I vastly prefer Akira/Yusuke if I'm going for slash, and if I'm going for het, Akira/Makoto or Akira/Futaba. 75% of the time when it comes to quality fic though, it's on Akira/Akechi, which is actually surprising because this is probably the most controversial pairing from canon. It's also the pairing I have the most mixed feelings on because of it's controversial issues. To be blunt, it NEEDS to be well written for me to actually believe it. There also needs to be a ton of angst in it for me to believe it too or it HAS to cover some issues when it comes to Akechi.

You'll also be seeing a TON of 'fix it' fics, for obvious reasons. But believe it or not, a lot of the fix it fics I've seen do NOT forget the shit that happens in the game. Well, most of the time. Sometimes I feel the characters are too forgiving, but it really depends on the character, the context of the story, and when the story takes place.

Also, I'm going to warn, because of this pairing in general, there's going to be a shit ton of end game spoilers (Most stories written for this pairing are either during late canon or post end game), it just can't be helped. So if you see me reviewing a fic that has anything to do with Akechi, assume that there's going to be end game spoilers.

Series: Persona 5
Title: if you never shoot, you'll never know
Author: junfhongs
Genre: Flangst, though more angst than fluff, AUish for end game
Rating: T
Warning: Fix it fic, AUish, massive spoilers for end game
Couple (if applicable): Akira/Akechi

Plot: 8/10 - There really isn't much of a plot to this, this is pretty much more of a character study than anything else. Basically, Akira finds Akechi outside of LeBlanc the day after Valentine's Day and takes him in. And the characters basically learn about each other that the other doesn't know and so on. There's also a bit of background about Akechi being in bigger shit that causes problems too and Akira wanting to help, but that's kind of the gist of what you could call a plot.

I think the summary of the story sums up this story well enough: "Since Akira was so obsessed with bringing out the light in him, Akechi could revel in the darkness that made Akira just a bit more real to him." It's also a big reason why I decided to read this fic to begin with, because the characters aren't just black and white. That Akira isn't a pure hearted hero (This is seen more so when he confronts Makoto), he does have some shades of black, and that Akechi isn't a cold hearted villain, that he does have shades of good inside (How he tells Akira that he was wrong for yelling at Makoto and the proceeding conversation, how he doesn't want to endanger Akira).

There is one thing I will give credit to, how Akechi survived. In canon, you max Akechi's Confident rank right after the whole Cognitive Double stint, so maybe because of that, it gave him the strength to somehow survive (His own Persona gaining some strength, though they usually evolve into another form, but Akechi is a kind of weird case). It's actually believable.

Writing: 9/10 - No problems with the writing. I really like the interactions between the characters. And though it pains me to admit it, I really liked the confrontation between Akira and Makoto and the aftermath conversation between Akira and Akechi, it's painful, but it manages to stay perfectly in character.

The story flips around to being really angsty for both parties and turning into fluff for both parties as well, which fits well with the story. Though there seems to be more angst than fluff, which to be honest, is how I like this pairing. It has enough angst for me, along with just enough fluff for me to be satisfied.

Characterization: 9/10 - Pretty much everyone is IC here, though Futaba is sort of pushing it. Then again, Futaba is very socially awkward, so I guess you could use that as excuse why she doesn't violently react to seeing Akechi alive (Even Haru was sort of forgiving in canon, like, 'I can't forgive you, but I understand how you feel'). She's also pretty rational too and probably believes in Akira, so she trusts his judgment, in the end.

They also, like I said above, aren't very black and white. And Akira's relationship to his parents in this story parallels very nicely to Akechi's. You see traces of Akira's dark past and how though he's usually calm and collected, even he has his limits. I really like that. I also like how Akechi doesn't want Akira to damage his relationships to others because of him, and how he has to fix his problems on his own.

Also, the fact I think a lot of people forget here: Akechi isn't stupid. I mean, a lot of what he was solving were 'pretend' cases, but he HAS shown in game canon that he has a brain.

Though I think this story ends a bit too happily, I think the ending is fitting. Basically, both boys can start a new life and to both, it's a new beginning to what may lead them, which actually fits in tone of the actual ending of the game.

Negatives: None really, unless you count the lack of plot

Summary: Pretty much a character study on Akira and Akechi that takes place after gameplay but before the game ends. Their relationship seems very black and white, hero and villain. That's how it's supposed to be. Yet not every villain is cold hearted and not every hero is a picture of virtue...

Overall: 8.6/10 - Pretty solid character study. Even if you don't ship this pairing, I'd still recommend it. It won't get you over the ship fence, but you may see the characters in a different light.

I'm going to admit, I think this series falls a little too much to your typical 'seme/uke' set up, moreso if you just read part 1. Part 2 changed my mind a bit, and while I prefer Takumi angst over Leo, the few fics I find that focus on Leo angst are really well written. I am still going to recommend part 1, because you really should know what is going through both character's heads, but part 2 is really the superior version.

This author tends to be hit and miss with me, but her ideas are so good that I can forgive the 'seme/uke' setup. And fuck me, I do like to see Takumi happy in the end. >.>

Series: Fire Emblem: Fates
Title: i am too alone in the world, and yet not alone enough
Author: CarbonFootprint
Genre: AU on Conquest timeline/Drama/Romance/Flangst, though swings more to angst than fluff
Rating: T
Warning: Massive amounts of angst from Leo and Takumi, end spoilers for Conquest, spoilers for Revelations conversation
Couple (if applicable): Leo/Takumi

Plot: 9/10 - I'm going to admit, this is the sort of AU I like, where one event changes and basically a butterfly effect follows. I'm putting this under a cut, because the plot basically spoils the end of Conquest. ( Conquest spoilers! )

And depending on what part you're reading, you'll see different things. Takumi's part focuses on his comatose state dreams, and you once again, get a rehash of their damn in game supports. I really wish people would just add their own damn flare instead of cooking 'copy pasta' of the whole thing. When he finally wakes up, he realizes the boy from his dream was that, a dream, and he has to deal with that and his own issues. You can kind of guess what the spell did to Takumi, and reading part 1, I didn't really understand why Leo was flipping out so badly.

Part 2 actually cleared up my big problem with part 1. And it makes a lot of sense. It's also really well written, and it satisfied my angst itch along with clearing up the problem I had with part 1. Basically, part 2 is from Leo's point of view and parallels part 1. And it does so really well. Part 2 also has an epilogue and there was supposed to be a part 3 (Never happened, the author kind of dropped out of fandom for some reason?), but part 2 ends in a satisfying enough way to not need anything after.

Basically, out of all the stories that cover 'soulmates' and Conquest AU endings, this one is probably the best well written.

Writing: 7/10 - The writing is just okay in part 1, though the interactions that Takumi has with his siblings save it a lot. Part 2's writing is far superior, and we get into Leo's head and the big problem I had with him from part 1 makes a ton of sense.

Though, to be honest, the writing is just okay, though it does greatly improve as the story moves on. The flow and the ideas of the piece, as a whole, are what make this two parter stand out from the rest of the stories I find on Ao3. This would be a great example of a really good and creative idea boasting the writing quality in general. I say boast, because the writing isn't bad, and is above quality work. It's just that the ideas and the conversations between the family members are really well done and stand out way more than the quality of writing.

I think the only thing that suffers is that Leo and Takumi sort of suffer from your typical 'yaoi seme/uke' setup. I say it's mostly on Takumi rather than Leo, but I'll get into that later.

Overall, it's a really good read. Despite the 'copy pasta' of the support conversations. Though I will admit, part 2 does sort of give it a flare of it's own compared to part 1.

Characterization: 8/10 - I would've given this score a 5 or a 6 if I was just basing it on Takumi and Leo's relationship to each other. There's too many tears and Takumi suffers more from the 'uke' syndrome that I see commonly in nearly every fanfic. It's a bit more excusable to some degree with him because of all his emotional baggage, especially in the conquest timeline.

Leo is somewhat excused from it in part 2 to some degree. ( Story spoilers )

However, they way the Royals are written is what saves it and allows me to excuse the typical yaoi dynamic. I freaking loved that the most in part 1, when Takumi finally wakes up and the way his siblings react to his awakening and recovery, because it's realistic and touching. I also like the interactions with Leo and the other siblings, how he keeps going to Corrin and asking her on Takumi's condition and the conversation he has with Xander.

Despite the small seme/uke hiccup, the rest of the cast is remarkably IC, and while Leo and Takumi dance near the OOC boarder, they never come too close to it to hurt the story.

Negatives: Somewhat cliche seme/uke setup, part 1 is somewhat inferior to part 2

Summary: An AU to the Fates Conquest timeline. During the final battle of the Conquest timeline, Leo notices the small spark of life behind the possessed Hoshido's Second Prince's eyes. Instead of killing him, he then decides to take a gamble on a untranslated spell from his Divine Weapon, Brynhilder...

Overall: 8/10 - A story that has a few hiccups, but is definitely worth the read. I recommend reading both parts in order. I wouldn't recommend it if you're not a fan of the pairing already, but if you are, this fic will satisfy you greatly, more so if you want an AU done right.

Anyways, I think it's break time again (I think I had my fill of Leo/Takumi for the moment) since Persona 5 is coming out real soon. MAYBE I'll find another Persona 4 fanfic in the meantime. >.>

Well, let's get away from BL Visual Novels for the moment and go back to what this journal originally was for, reviewing fanfics! Today, I'm going to cover a fandom that I surprisingly didn't expect myself to fall into.

I have a soft fondness for Fire Emblem series. My first game was on the GBA and I never finished it due to me not wanting ANY unit to die. I originally bought my 3DS for other games, and one of them was for Awakening. Luckily, the game allowed you to choose if you wanted to go the 'normal FE' style route or make it where a unit dies, they're just out for that particular map. I may cover some Awakening fanfics in the future, but for right now, we're going to talk about Fates instead.

Believe it or not, most of the fanfic I come across for Fates (That doesn't have obviously troll summaries at least) is pretty high quality stuff. At least in the slash department. When it comes to het, I get a lot more misses than hits, and considering that the amount of slash is nearly triple as the amount of het, it's kind of disappointing.

For the most part, I'm a Royal fan, and I'm very fond of Takumi most of all. Followed by Leo and Xander. And finding fics featuring them with Corrin... is rare. Like I think I can count less than 10 fanfics featuring EITHER one of these pairings that was worth the read. While finding fics for Takumi and Leo, on the other hand, are a dime a freaking dozen, and I found WAY more quality works. Luckily, I like this ship as well, so I win either way. >.>

But here's a thing I noticed a LOT with this fandom: fucking modern AUs. Why the fuck do you want to put characters in obvious fantasy settings in our own universe!? It just really floors me how people want to throw every sort of fandom into our world!

Sometimes, shock and surprise, it does work. Though, with my taste, I prefer AUs, as in one change setting up a butterfly effect (Or in the game's case, an AU happening in the Conquest or Birthright timeline changing things). This... is not one of them. The writing isn't too terrible, but the fic is just so meh in of itself...

Series: Fire Emblem: Fates
Title: Totally Not Friends
Author: Novaluna
Genre: Fluff/humor/slow build (aka relationship building)
Rating: T
Warning: Recycled support dialogue, meh attempt at humor, though it tries, sisters acting like shipping brats?
Couple (if applicable): Leo/Takumi, background Corrin/Silas and Kamui/Oboro

Plot: 5/10 - This scores pretty low only because it's just so meh. Basically, Corrin and Kamui (aka, female and male avatar) take their siblings to a beach house to spend one month of their summer vacation. Takumi and Leo have to share the same bedroom and... you can pretty much guess what happens there.

It's boring, it's predictable, it's... very meh. I really have nothing else to say, because it barely runs as a Fire Emblem fanfic, and I can barely recognize the characters from their canon counterparts.

Writing: 5/10 - The quality of the writing seems to dip in places, but not to the point of some other works I covered on here. The first few chapters are eye roll worthy because it's just another 'Let's copy and paste Takumi and Leo's C and B support right from the game!' Seriously, I don't mind if people want to add their support conversations into their stories, but add some flare or originality to it instead of a pure copy pasta that stands out from your writing!

While the writing does pick up in the next chapter, the quality dips later on, then improves and then dips again. I almost wonder if the same person is doing it or maybe the author was distracted while writing this.

Probably the worst example of instantly taking me out of a heart warming scene is the start of this paragraph in chapter 11, when Leo is comforting Takumi out of a nightmare and Leo ends up kissing him and the following is written right after:

"It wasn't exceedingly amorous -nobody stuck their tongue in anyone's mouth, or -gods forbid- ripped someones clothes off- and it was very chaste kiss, but it was a kiss, and it was passionate nonetheless."

That would be fine and dandy if this scene was coming off as humor, but it's not. Not to mention the sentence itself is very bland and really out of place, moreso the sentence in between the hyphens. It comes off as author's notes and is the wrong way to use them too. I mean, you don't need to go the purple prose route, but have some more description besides 'it was chaste and passionate'. Or basically, show, don't tell.

And what's funny, is it still tries to be heart warming to some degree. It's like the story sometimes can't decide if it wants to be heart warming or 'TEEHEE!' type of humor.

Characterization: 4/10 - Like I said above, you can barely recognize the characters. In fact, you can basically slap other names over the proper names and barely tell it was a Fire Emblem fanfic. But is that because they're written OOC? Or is it because of the boring cliche plotline? Probably a mixture of both. I feel like the featured characters, Leo and Takumi, suffer less from the OOCness than the others, who are basically along for the ride to 'get their brothers together'.

Just... oi...

Corrin and Kamui have been basically reduced to 'shipper' brats, which just basically makes me facepalm. I mean, do people forget that your avatar DOES have a personality in the game to some degree!? Everyone suffers from OOCness, and that seems to be a trend with modern AUs in general. Though to be fair, there are a few that do work, it doesn't in this story.

Negatives: Cliche, quality dips in the writing, other characters reduced to shipper brats, copy pasta support conversation
Summary: Corrin and Kamui take their respective siblings to the beach for the summer. Stuff happens. Mostly revolving around their younger brothers hooking up.

Overall: 4.6/10 - Do yourself a favor and read this work instead by the same author, the quality and writing is WAY better than this story. It's not really a Takumi/Leo shipper fic, but it is evidence that this writer can produce good quality stuff.

I also need to stop writing these reviews at like 12-1 in the morning, so many typos I found in my own review (That, and I think my keyboard is dying on me, because hitting the backspace button isn't working half the time anymore). Next, maybe I'll grab one of the AU fics that I found that did work for the fandom.

I'm going to be really honest here, I think anyone reading this series should skip this part and go to part three. Reading this part almost killed the series for me, and if it wasn't for me being stubborn, I'd probably would have given up on this series.

I already said Hisoka's characterization was really bad in part 1. In part 2? It's really fucking painful.

Series: Yami no Matsuei
Title: Surpassing
Author: gaudior
Genre: Angst, getting over fic (Is that even a genre!?), build up fic?
Rating: M
Warnings: Lots of mentions of rape, possible squick moments, OOC Hisoka
Couple (if applicable): Tsuzuki/Hisoka, mentions of past Muraki/Hisoka and Muraki/Tsuzuki

Plot: 5/10 - There's kind of no real plot, it's basically Hisoka coming to terms to his feelings to Tsuzuki and trying to deal with the aftermath of 'that famous night under the Sakura Trees'.

But it's not written well here. And it's really hard to explain it because it has nothing to do with the writing itself. I think part of the problem is that in part 1, Hisoka was desperate to have 'alone time' to figure things out and in part 2, he's hanging out and staring at Tsuzuki and is like 'oh, I love him', even though in part 1, he basically said, 'I like you, but not like that'. Like boy, make up your mind already!

Also, I highly doubt that after being possessed by a ghost is going to magically change Hisoka's views on everything. I actually like the idea of Hisoka starting to appreciate stuff he never seemed to appreciate. Like food. Or seeing places he's familiar with in a new light. Or deciding to spend time with Tsuzuki, which he seemed to have a BIG problem with in the previous part and in this part, he's suddenly a-okay with it. And touching him, even though the previous part, he obviously had a problem with! Or reading a book on sex (That blows my mind between 'holy shit, that's a creative idea!, 'wtf am I reading!?', and 'omg, I am rotflmao land!').

The problem is this story has a lot of good ideas, but they're not executed well. Being possessed by a ghost isn't suddenly going to change Hisoka's tastebuds or is going to improve any of his senses in such detail (A demon, quite possibly, but a human ghost? Probably not). Or realizing that he suddenly is in love with Tsuzuki isn't going to make him appreciate the taste of food or make the color and shapes around him stand out more. And if it did, I'm assuming he'd go to Watari about it, cause he's a doctor after all.

Him wanting to spend time with Tsuzuki all of a sudden should happen later in the fic instead of near the beginning, especially since the point of part 1 was more focused around, 'I need some me time!' and this takes a 180 direction to 'I need to spend time with him!'

Also, Hisoka randomly punching Tsuzuki because 'I felt like it', while amusing, doesn't he already kind of do that in the manga at least? Well, not like punch, but hitting Tsuzuki, yeah. So it's sort of doesn't make any sense (But you can say this is based on the anime, but doesn't he slap Tsuzuki around in the anime too)?

Though I will admit, I do like the fact that he thinks he's still possessed and when he tries to exorcise himself... yeah, things aren't going to go well here. And then he realizes that yes, those are his feelings, not the remains of a ghost. Again, that's a brilliant idea. But the lead in to get to that part, it's not executed well.

And then there's the whole 'I'm going to study about sex!' thing. Which I can totally see Hisoka doing. But something seems wrong. And then him coming to the conclusion that Muraki raped Tsuzuki and... yeah, this actually made me REALLY uncomfortable, and I'll talk about it in the characterization part.

A perfect example of a story that has some really great ideas, but they're not done exactly right.

Writing: 8/10 - This is where the story shines. The descritpions and the overall writing flow is much better in this part.

This was one of my favorite lines of Hisoka describing what he's feeling from Tsuzuki:

"How often did Tsuzuki feel really delighted, after all? Not just the passing pleasure of a dessert or a sunny day, but this sort of ringing bone-deep rejoicing? It blended with the physical sensation of Tsuzuki’s side against his shoulder, of his shoulder against Tsuzuki’s side, so that the touch seemed to vibrate colors almost too intense to handle. Hisoka sighed and realized that some of the pleasure he was feeling was his own. This... this is okay, he thought. This is all right. "

Basically, the writing is about the same, if not, better, than the last part.

Characteriztion 3/10 - Again, this story focuses on mostly just Tsuzuki and Hisoka. And while I think Tsuzuki is perfectly in character, the same can't be said about Hisoka.

Again, when the focus is on Hisoka and just Hisoka alone (Usually with his feelings towards Tsuzuki mixed in), it's boarderline OOC. Part of it has to do with the plot this time. This part is a perfect example of a bunch of really great ideas not executed correctly. Hisoka makes a lot of dumb decisions in this story, and the boarderline OOC does not help.

An example is Hisoka figuring he's still possessed and that he's not. His reasoning isn't off either, his views of the world has changed, and it started happening after he was possessed. But instead of, I don't know, talking to the DOCTOR about how his sense of taste and sight had changed, he keeps it to himself. I'd kind of think that if Hisoka's senses were off, he'd go to Watari about it, because that's kind of what doctors are for. And the explaination of his senses changing doesn't really make much sense. Love isn't going to magically make food taste better to me, that's for damn sure.

Hisoka also goes from one extreme to another way too fast too. Basically, part 1 doesn't really mesh too well with part 2. Part 1, Hisoka seemed too cold and distant. In this part, he seems a bit too emotional and accepting that he's in love with Tsuzuki.

And then there's the part I really didn't want to get into but I have to: The famous night. I could totally see Hisoka trying to find a book about sex and logically reasoning it out.

But the problem here, is that Hisoka sort of already knows what 'sleeping with another person' is, and at other times, he's ignorant of it. Not to mention, he's a rape victim, so...

I've read a lot of fics of Hisoka trying to get over this issue, from trying to logically analyzing it out, to the 'bathing in the light of the cock' type of scenario (GAG), to 'dark route' scenario, to just about every type of scenario. I personally enjoy Hisoka going the logical route, because Hisoka strikes me as a very intelligent individual. This fic tries to go to a more logical standpoint.

Oh, how I regret what I wished for...

It's almost painful for me to read, not because it's emotional or angsty or tragic, but... it feels really really off. It's really hard to explain why it doesn't work in the context of this story. Maybe it's because Hisoka seems too knowledgable one second and the next, he's completely ignorant.

And then I realized something that made me really uncomfortable: In this story, when Hisoka realizes that Muraki raped Tsuzuki (Urgh, I'll get into that), and realizing Tsuzuki still wants to sleep with him, even though he's a rape victim himself... THAT didn't sit too well with me, especially since the story takes place almost a month after they save Tsuzuki. It's like driving by a horrible automobile accident and not being able to look away.

Not to mention, some people think Muraki raped Tsuzuki when he kidnapped him during the Kyoto arc (Again, rapist!Muraki ~_~;;;;;;;). Is it possible? Canon-wise, I honestly don't think so. Muraki was only after Tsuzuki because of his self healing and his revenge on Saki. Could it have happened? I'm going to say no, but you could make a case for it, in the anime at least.

I think that's my overall problem. We have Hisoka, a rape victim, trying to deal with his feelings toward Tsuzuki, who is also a rape victim, but his feelings toward Hisoka are pretty damn clear, regardless of what happened to him. Not only were both raped, but they were raped by the same person, Muraki. Two people raped by the same person coming together... For some reason, I find the whole thing REALLY unsettling and I can see people being squicked out by it. Not to mention, I think part of me was angry that we reduced Muraki down to a one dimensional villian yet again.

Like, can we have a single YnM story without rapist!Muraki!? Or are we gonna forget the whole 'I wanna put my brother's head on Tsuzuki's self healing body!' scheme??? Isn't the fact that he probably messed Tsuzuki up both physically and mentally just as bad??? Couldn't we use a plot device more on the lines of mind rape and not physical rape!? And my question after reading part 3 is that no, we're not going to forget that, but I'll go into that next time.

Does this make it a negative to the story? No. Is it an unrealistic scenario? Not really. Can I see people feeling uncomfortable reading this? Yeah, I really can. Not to mention, I absolutely hate stories that use Muraki as a rape device, and while this is fixed and has it's reason in part 3, it doesn't make me any less annoyed about it here. And maybe that's why I dislike this part the most out of all three.

Overall, the characterization of Hisoka is off, and this time, it has to do with the plot. Which is a shame, there's not a lot of build-up fics for this pairing. Yeah, not enough build-up fics for Tsuzuki/Hisoka, I just said that. There's random drive by fluff/angst and there's your PwP fics, but actual build up relationship fics? You'll be lucky to find more than 10 and that's me being REALLY generous.

This part tries it, and has the ideas for it. But again, not executed well.

Negatives: OOC Hisoka, very squicky moments
Summary: Hisoka comes to terms to his feelings toward Tsuzuki alongside getting over past issues.
Overall: 5.3/10 - Honestly, skip this part. It's painful to read and if you're easily squicked by rape issues, definitely skip it. This part isn't needed to enjoy the last part of the series anyways. In fact, I'd say skip both part 1 and 2 and just go to part 3.

Next up, the conclusion to the series. And lemme say, honestly, it can serve as a stand alone story if you really don't want to read part 1 and 2. You'll see why.

Warning for bitchiness ahead. This also almost became a rant, so beware on that.

Actually, I take back about the series I was going to cover, because this... needs to be seen and said. Why? Well, I found a fic recently on Ao3 and recent YnM works? VERY rare nowadays.

I was also boggled by the amount of comments on this work. Skimming through the YnM section on Ao3, very few stories had more than 4 comments (This is discounting author replies btw) unless it was multi-chapter, multi-fandom, or older than a year. And this story was less than a month old! So curiosity compelled me to take a look at it.

I am FLOORED that this fic got as many comments as it did and NOT ONE FUCKING PERSON pointed out a GLARING mistake in this fic.

Series: Yami no Matsuei
Title: Closer to Me
Author: Veleda_k
Genre: Flangst
Rating: T
Warnings: A good idea that falls flat (Is that even a warning?), bland writing, Misspelling the MAIN CHARACTER'S name
Couple (if applicable): Tsuzuki/Hisoka

Plot: 7/10 - Okay, I'm going to give the author credit here. Basically, we see flashbacks of Tsuzuki and Hisoka interaction covering each of the anime arcs where one character visits the other. I thought it was creative idea and showing the reader how their relationship changes over the course of the anime. A perfect set up for build up fic or just random drive by fluff.

Now, if it was well written, this actually would be a better example of how to write fluff than the previous story I reviewed.

Le sigh...

Writing: 2/10 - The biggest mistake an author can make, and that instantly takes me out of a story isn't boring writing. Not common word spelling errors. Not period misplacements or comma splices. Not bad characterization.

It's spelling the canon character's name wrong. Worse, the main fucking protagonist. And yes, 'Clean Kill', I am ESPECIALLY looking at fucking you.

I counted a total of THREE times that this fic spelled Tsuzuki as 'Tsuzki' (2 times) and 'Tszuki'. And two of these are near the end of the story and one of them is the LAST FUCKING PARAGRAPH of the GODDAMN FIC! There is no excuse for this, like none. It's like the author just threw this up and didn't either read it herself or get someone to read it over for her.

Shame on you readers who left comments and failed to point this out. Because if this was my story? I'd be beyond embarrassed and would fix it asap!

This isn't going into how bad some sentences sound, how flat the story runs, too much 'noun verb' sentences, Surgatanus (It's Sarganatas and I looked it up on anime news network to make sure it's correct) and just... how overall bland this fic runs.

A few examples:

"(Hisoka had never used a computer before the Shokan division, but he was learning just fine. He wasn't an idiot. Unlike some people.)"

For some reason, the first sentence didn't translate properly into my head, and I realized it was because my mind kept trying to put a verb inbetween 'before' and 'the Shokan division'. It is grammarly correct, but it just... doesn't sound right. Also, this doesn't need to be in parenthesis, mostly because it doesn't add anything to the sentence before it. It wrecks the overall flow of the story.

And this isn't the first time this story has interrupted/overall bad flow, trust me.

"Tsuzuki's joking tone and expression faded. “Sorry. I wanted to talk to you,” he said again"

A period is missing at the end of 'he said again'. Not to mention, you don't even need it, because we already know who is speaking thanks to the beginning part of this.

"Tsuzuki needed comfort, that was clear. The problem was that Hisoka was terrible at comfort. It wasn't that he never looked out for Tsuzuki, but he did it by shoving antacids in his hands when he was hungover (or by nearly killing him to prevent the demon possessing him from killing everyone Tsuzuki loved, but Hisoka was trying not to think too much about that), not by saying the right things. For a mind reader, Hisoka was shit at knowing the right thing to say."

I'm going to admit right here, I had to reread this entire paragraph several times before it finally translated into my head. And then it took another read for me to understand just WHY it wasn't catching with me. And I found the answer: the parenthesis sentence interrupted the flow of the original sentence.

The sentence in the parenthesis doesn't even need to be in parenthesis yet again. It could exist outside of it. The sentence flow is way off, it almost feels like a really bad run-on sentence and I blame the sentence in parenthesis for that. This story has a pattern of interrupted flow thanks to the parenthesis that doesn't even need to be there.

Also, Hisoka isn't a mind reader, he's an Empath. While Telepathy and Empathy can co-exist with each other and there's canon evidence that Hisoka does have a bit of telepathy, his powers lean to reading emotions.

And really, did we use 'shit' as a description? Not to mention, that last sentence sounds really awkward.

"But he knew that if he had called in advance, Tsuzuki would have insisted he was fine. (It was what Hisoka would have done if Tsuzuki had ever called him before showing up.) Luckily, Tsuzuki was home, which meant Hisoka didn't have to feel any stupider than he did already."

An example again of a parenthesis that isn't needed. And again, another paragraph I had to read a few times before it made sense in my mind, because a lot of the sentences in the parenthesis? Really badly interrupt the flow of the story.

I'm going to stop because if I had to point out every goddamn nitpick at this story, this would turn into a beta read. And I'd be repeating the same problem over and over again. Basically, the writing flow is a complete mess.

Characterization: 5/10 - The characters are flat as pancakes and this is more tied into the flat writing rather than characters acting OOC. For the most part, the author was on par with the characters, but the writing makes them... flat. I also think part of the problem was me having to reread parts of the story because it didn't seem to translate right in my head. And having to reread the same paragraph 3 times or more totally threw my mind out of the story.

It's a shame, because I find a lot of fics that are decently written are wildly OOC. I don't come across too many fics where the characters are IC, but it doesn't feel like them because of the writing.

Negatives: Flat writing, canon names are misspelt
Summary: Sniplits of Tsuzuki and Hisoka, covering each anime arc, and how they fall into each other
Overall: 4.6/10 - Flat writing can destroy a really good idea. This fic is a perfect example of this.

Again, shame on you commenters who didn't point out Tsuzuki's name being misspelled. We constantly complain about quality of fanfiction. Well, how are we going to improve the quality of fanfiction when we can't point out obvious errors like this and not be called a 'troll' or whatnot??? Yeah, it's a hobby and what not, but have some mother fucking PRIDE in what you post up!

Anyways, I'm going to stop before this becomes a rant. NOW next time, I'm really going to do a series I promised last time!

It's been a while, hasn't it? As per usual.

This time, I'm going back to a fandom that I actually participated in over a decade ago. So be warned, you're going to see a lot of older writing on here, mostly. And I'm also going to try to go into these fics with a more open mind rather than a 'omg, grate story, writmoarplz!' phase. So you may see 'unpopular opinion' type of thing depending on the author. And I'm also going to try to post 'fic that I liked, fic that's bad fic' type of thing, aka, I try to find a good fic in my opinion and not rant/rave on just badfics.

As a warning, I'm a Tsuzuki/Hisoka shipper, so the majority of these fics are going to be on that pairing.

Let's start on a positive note! I found this fic totally by accident, and I am so glad of that accident too! And how can I resist a seme!Hisoka piece?

Series: Yami no Matsuei
Title: Worker's Compensation
Author: ladysisyphus
Genre: PwP (Is that it's own genre!?)/angst
Rating: AO
Warnings: Very PwPish, though technically has a case, some angst, seme!Hisoka
Couple (if applicable): Hisoka/Tsuzuki

Plot: 9/10 - Um, there's kind of no plot to this, so I'm not going to score here on plot, but more the idea. Why the fuck out of the many YnM fics I've read, barely ANY of them involve demons (Save the one from the Devil's Trill Arc), more so, in this case, an incubus!? It's like the perfect set up for some perfect PwP fic! This not only tickled my 'holy shit, why didn't anyone think of this till now!?' side, but it also tickled my Shin Megami Tensei/Persona side, as those games involve demons and yes, you can get a incubus as a demon in both series. This author also did write for Persona so... >.>

Basically, this story has the perfect setup for this series that you can write a PwP fic on it easily. And you'd think you wouldn't find any character building or angst and just get porn? Think again. Well, not so much character building, but angst... There's quite a bit of understated angst in this fic along with a ton of sexual tension. And it all basically boils to a head due to the case.

Writing: 10/10 - The writing to this piece? Brilliant. That's all I could say. You can feel the sexual tension from the beginning of this fic right to the very end. There's a lot of telling in this fic, which would probably be the only nitpick I have about it. But you can still feel the emotions and the angst behind it through the character's actions.

Characterization: 8/10 - This fic manages to keep Tsuzuki and Hisoka in character fairly well. Now granted, there's not a lot of character building here, and the story doesn't cover the typical 'fandom' heavy issues, like Muraki, the 'famous night', etc etc. It... really doesn't need to, in the case of the story. It does have angst in it that you typically find, but it meshes so damn well with this fic, and it's just the right amount of angst you'll be satisfied with. It also leaves on a 'yeah, we have to talk' note, but in a positive kind of light.

Negativities: None, unless you don't care much for PwP fics in general

Summary: A case goes... in a completely unexpected direction. And brings hidden supressed tensions to a boil.

Overall: 9/10 - Perfect fic to read if you want a one shot with sweet porn with a dash of angst.

And I realized I haven't reviewed a single Persona 4 fanfic yet! This fandom can produce a lot of twisted shit, lemme tell you. A lot of it is, thank god, good. I'm pretty open minded with pairings in general, even though I still really like the bromance of the main character and Yosuke rather than being for each other. But I guess the game throws too much hintings (You have to purposely go for it, they're still there though, mostly for the lulz) that I caved in and read for them. Didn't regret it, thankfully.

But then I saw the main pairing for this fic and I said 'fuck it, let's read it anyways!' Now, I've been reading fanfiction for close to two decades. I've never been disturbed by anything I've read, even the worst fanfiction I've gotten through fine. That ended when I read this monster fic.

Please be warned, I do spoil the game here, so if you haven't played the game yet, go do so right now, because Persona 4 is probably one of the best RPGs you'll ever play.

Series: Persona 4
Title: Sympathy Crime
Edit: For some reason the fic disappeared on Ao3. Hum, not a good sign. But you can still find the fic here.

Author: Sodomquake
Genre: Darkfic, drama/angst
Rating: AO
Warnings: Boarderlining non-con, graphic violence, mindfuckage, underage sex with a minor
Couple (if applicable): Adachi/Yosuke (!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!), Souji(MC)/Yosuke

Plot: 10/10 - This is... probably one of the most disturbing fanfics I've ever read. But in the good way. I... really cannot say what goes on without spoiling the fuck out of it, but basically, Adachi and Yosuke end up in a relationship that is beyond unhealthy and even boarderline consenual, not to mention, an underage minor sleeping with an adult. There is tons of mindfuck moments, moments where you laugh, moments where you cry, moments where you feel so hurt that you have to take a break because of it all. I mean, the fic starts off pretty normal, with Yosuke feeling a little down because Souji is juggling social links up the bumhole, Adachi being a sick-fuck, wants to mess with the team, and a plan forms. It then... just spirals out of control from there.

The thing of it is that it does so so naturally and if you didn't already hate Adachi after you find out about him, you will hate him a hell of a lot more here. What's worse, is when you start to feel sympathy for Adachi at some parts later on and you feel like your mind is about to explode because you're supposed to be angry as fuck at him and... Jesus...

This fic is sort of AU to the game, but it could actually fit very well in the game and it doesn't derive too much from the game's general plot in general.

Writing: 10/10 - Nothing wrong with this fic here. I love how the fic changes to first person and we get to see what Adachi is thinking, because holy shit, I wanted to stab him many times with a meat cleaver. But it also feels natural, and the reader needs to know what Adachi is thinking and plotting. And then after you find out what he's plotting... I think I had my stomach twist in knots a few times because of it.

Overall, there's like nothing wrong with it at all.

Characterization: 10/10 - The characters feel like themselves from the game. I know Adachi was mentally disturbed after finding out he's the 'real' culprit of the murder case, but this story takes it to another level. And it feels like something Adachi would do, considering how bitter he is at life in general, and he probably hates the Investigation Team a hell of a lot because they were "spoiling his fun". What better way to get back at him than this?

Yosuke here... man, he is thrown through the angst wagon and beyond here. The way he falls, and how everything just spirals out of control for him... Jesus. And then we have Souji trying to play the adult, only to have that break down eventually, and it's just... so heartbreaking. Especially seeing his best friend rapidly change and how he just can't handle it...

I really can't say anymore without spoiling it, so I'll leave it at that.

Negativities: LOTS OF MINDFUCK!, non-con with a minor, dumptrucks full of angst
Summary: Yosuke starts feeling depressed, it's also not helping that his best friend keeps blowing him off. Adachi notices, plots, and takes complete advantage of it...
Overall: 10/10 - If you can stomach the mindfuckery and handle the warnings, this is a MUST READ fic. Just.... don't read this story in one sitting.