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Fanfiction review, be warned. >.>
May. 12th, 2003 03:18 amSeries: Yami no Matsuei
Title: Corrupted Innocense (Yeah, I know innocence is spelt wrong. :P)
Author: Reality's Arch Nemesis
Genre: Romance/Angst
Rating: R
Warning: NCS, NCS references, Shounen-ai, violence, Muraki being a bitch (Yes, that deserves a warning. :D)
Couple (if applicable): No flocking clue, so far, it leans to Hisoka/Original character
Plot: 4/10 I'll admit, the plot is half way decent. But that's it. It's pretty unoriginal otherwise. The only theory that's kinda good is what if one of the Shinigami did have... you know, with a girl that was still alive. It's never said specifically in the manga, yeah, BUT... The only thing we can say is 'well, they're dead, stupid'. Technically, they're re-animated, and people can read through THOSE lines. >.> And WHY would Hisoka have another chance to live on Earth??? That doesn't really make much sense...
Writing: 3/10 SPELL check please. FIX the format, please, TWO spaces after a period, enter key AFTER someone talks. Commas are your friend too. :X Commas aren't periods either, vice versa too. :D Come ON, this person says they haven't written in a while, but that's absolutely NO EXCUSE not to run this through basic checkers.
Characterization: 2/10 This is where it leans off. Tsuzuki getting possessed WAY too easily, Muraki being more into this OC than Tsuzuki, another bad sign. Hisoka is OOC here too. Typical markings of a Mary Sue, only I can't call this a Mary Sue. @_@ It's like a cross bread of a Mary Sue and Gary Stu. Hence, dubbed Mary Stu. >.>
Negativities: Bad spelling, bad grammar, format is off, plot is only so-so, and characterizations are butchered, not to mention that this is leaning to a Hisoka/Other character romance....
Summary: Oish, here we go...
( Cut for spoilers for Yami no Matsuei )
All in all, this fic falls flat. It had potentional to be good before but now... ARGH. People, run your fic through the basics and HAVE some freaking pride in your fic!
Overall score - 3/10 A fic you probably want to avoid unless the author works on it.
Title: Corrupted Innocense (Yeah, I know innocence is spelt wrong. :P)
Author: Reality's Arch Nemesis
Genre: Romance/Angst
Rating: R
Warning: NCS, NCS references, Shounen-ai, violence, Muraki being a bitch (Yes, that deserves a warning. :D)
Couple (if applicable): No flocking clue, so far, it leans to Hisoka/Original character
Plot: 4/10 I'll admit, the plot is half way decent. But that's it. It's pretty unoriginal otherwise. The only theory that's kinda good is what if one of the Shinigami did have... you know, with a girl that was still alive. It's never said specifically in the manga, yeah, BUT... The only thing we can say is 'well, they're dead, stupid'. Technically, they're re-animated, and people can read through THOSE lines. >.> And WHY would Hisoka have another chance to live on Earth??? That doesn't really make much sense...
Writing: 3/10 SPELL check please. FIX the format, please, TWO spaces after a period, enter key AFTER someone talks. Commas are your friend too. :X Commas aren't periods either, vice versa too. :D Come ON, this person says they haven't written in a while, but that's absolutely NO EXCUSE not to run this through basic checkers.
Characterization: 2/10 This is where it leans off. Tsuzuki getting possessed WAY too easily, Muraki being more into this OC than Tsuzuki, another bad sign. Hisoka is OOC here too. Typical markings of a Mary Sue, only I can't call this a Mary Sue. @_@ It's like a cross bread of a Mary Sue and Gary Stu. Hence, dubbed Mary Stu. >.>
Negativities: Bad spelling, bad grammar, format is off, plot is only so-so, and characterizations are butchered, not to mention that this is leaning to a Hisoka/Other character romance....
Summary: Oish, here we go...
( Cut for spoilers for Yami no Matsuei )
All in all, this fic falls flat. It had potentional to be good before but now... ARGH. People, run your fic through the basics and HAVE some freaking pride in your fic!
Overall score - 3/10 A fic you probably want to avoid unless the author works on it.
