Starza's Fandom Blog (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
starzafandomblog) wrote2018-01-26 12:13 am
starzafandomblog) wrote2018-01-26 12:13 am
Entry tags:
Wow, more bad fanfic twice in a row! Persona 5
Sigh, why does my preferred pairing seem to attract bad writers nowadays? With Akira/Yusuke, I either get some really deep character study that focuses on Yusuke or just... really bad fluff. You don't see too much angst, or if you do, Yusuke is always the focus. Rarely do I see it involve Akira (It's still not common with Akira/Akechi fics, but I did find some quality work that focused on both), so to see it on my preferred pairing...
Too bad it's the most bottom barrel cliche angst you can find. ~_~;;; I should've known better since the author wrote another fic for this pairing, but it wasn't written well either.
Series: Persona 5
Title: Every day used to be the same
Author: RainbowPlane
Genre: Angst
Rating: M mostly for the warnings
Warning: self harm, depression, suicide, totally OOC (Even the author tags that)
Couple (if applicable): Akira/Yusuke
Plot: 2/10 - Do I even need to say anything here? Akira is depressed, he cuts himself, he yells at the people who care about him, Yusuke confesses to Akira, and then Akira kills himself at the end, leaving poor Yusuke alone and depressed. I mean, this is like the most bottom barrel angst you can get. You got self harm, you got depression, and suicide. Now, these three issues can be done IF it's well written. I saw some depressed/suicidal Akira fanfics that were well written and written in the context of canon. I've seen other fics written for other characters as well, so it's not like a good written fic can't be done. Hell, the CANON game has some of these themes in it.
This is NOT the fic. It also doesn't follow canon for obvious reason (Hell, I don't even know where this takes place IN canon). It's not built up well, and it's pretty much OOC. And of course, it ends in death, because that's how all poorly written angst fics end!
It's also funny reading how depressed Akira is, when his canon counterpart is like the total opposite. Here, we have a resigned, unenergetic Akira, while Akira in canon is cool, confidant, and can have his troll moments ('You jealy?', 'Be-boop', and 'Honey, I'm home!' always come to mind). If this took place around late November or near the end of the game, I'd say it has more merit. But this takes place in at least late August.
Writing: 2/10 - Bland as burnt toast, that's all I have to really say. It's also very stilted and emotionless, which, given the issues in the fic, shouldn't be the case.
Also, sometimes, the author has Yusuke's tone of voice down really well, and then the author totally tosses the tone out the window. It's... really jarring at times.
I mean, the only reason it doesn't score lower is because it passes basic grammar and spelling check, which isn't a positive.
Characterization 2/10 - Like the last story, 'What characterization'? I mean, I don't even know when this story takes place (Post Futaba, but pre-Haru?), let alone, Akira is pretty much OOC. I mean, the only reason why this doesn't sit at a 1 is because Yusuke's dialogue is at least close to his canon tone. And the other characters only appear very briefly, which is really a blessing.
Negatives: Poorly written angst, OOCness, very low quality writing in general
Summary: Akira has severe depression and cuts himself. Yusuke picks up on it. It doesn't end well...
Overall: 2/10 - Like I said, bottom barrel angst. It's actually hard to comment on a fic like this because it's so bland and doesn't handle the issues with respect to canon. The author promises another story with the focus on Akira/Akechi next and I just want to say, 'NO!' That is a pairing where these themes can work, but it MUST be well written, and just looking at this story... No, don't do it!
Maybe I'll go back to good fic sometime again for this fandom. Or I might hang up my hat, because I'm starting to get burnt out on Persona 5 fanfic.
Too bad it's the most bottom barrel cliche angst you can find. ~_~;;; I should've known better since the author wrote another fic for this pairing, but it wasn't written well either.
Series: Persona 5
Title: Every day used to be the same
Author: RainbowPlane
Genre: Angst
Rating: M mostly for the warnings
Warning: self harm, depression, suicide, totally OOC (Even the author tags that)
Couple (if applicable): Akira/Yusuke
Plot: 2/10 - Do I even need to say anything here? Akira is depressed, he cuts himself, he yells at the people who care about him, Yusuke confesses to Akira, and then Akira kills himself at the end, leaving poor Yusuke alone and depressed. I mean, this is like the most bottom barrel angst you can get. You got self harm, you got depression, and suicide. Now, these three issues can be done IF it's well written. I saw some depressed/suicidal Akira fanfics that were well written and written in the context of canon. I've seen other fics written for other characters as well, so it's not like a good written fic can't be done. Hell, the CANON game has some of these themes in it.
This is NOT the fic. It also doesn't follow canon for obvious reason (Hell, I don't even know where this takes place IN canon). It's not built up well, and it's pretty much OOC. And of course, it ends in death, because that's how all poorly written angst fics end!
It's also funny reading how depressed Akira is, when his canon counterpart is like the total opposite. Here, we have a resigned, unenergetic Akira, while Akira in canon is cool, confidant, and can have his troll moments ('You jealy?', 'Be-boop', and 'Honey, I'm home!' always come to mind). If this took place around late November or near the end of the game, I'd say it has more merit. But this takes place in at least late August.
Writing: 2/10 - Bland as burnt toast, that's all I have to really say. It's also very stilted and emotionless, which, given the issues in the fic, shouldn't be the case.
Also, sometimes, the author has Yusuke's tone of voice down really well, and then the author totally tosses the tone out the window. It's... really jarring at times.
I mean, the only reason it doesn't score lower is because it passes basic grammar and spelling check, which isn't a positive.
Characterization 2/10 - Like the last story, 'What characterization'? I mean, I don't even know when this story takes place (Post Futaba, but pre-Haru?), let alone, Akira is pretty much OOC. I mean, the only reason why this doesn't sit at a 1 is because Yusuke's dialogue is at least close to his canon tone. And the other characters only appear very briefly, which is really a blessing.
Negatives: Poorly written angst, OOCness, very low quality writing in general
Summary: Akira has severe depression and cuts himself. Yusuke picks up on it. It doesn't end well...
Overall: 2/10 - Like I said, bottom barrel angst. It's actually hard to comment on a fic like this because it's so bland and doesn't handle the issues with respect to canon. The author promises another story with the focus on Akira/Akechi next and I just want to say, 'NO!' That is a pairing where these themes can work, but it MUST be well written, and just looking at this story... No, don't do it!
Maybe I'll go back to good fic sometime again for this fandom. Or I might hang up my hat, because I'm starting to get burnt out on Persona 5 fanfic.